The end or the beginning...

It has been my experience that in life some endings are sad because they were actually an end to something fantastic in our lives...a great trip, an awesome school year, a great project...and some endings are sad because of conformity, because its harder to evolve than to rot in the same horrible situation we have become accustomed to.  The last few months have been that kind of ending for me.  I think back on a time before the x-factor and remember how many opportunities I had to escape and how I always stayed or got sucked back in that at the end of the day I gave up and became one with it, but my inner ninja hadn't given up the fight just yet and finally freed myself from said situation.  It was to my surprise how hard rebuilding myself was, how much easier it felt to just go back although I was so unhappy.  I think we all do this, conform, give up, take the easy although unhappy road just so we don't have to do anything hard.  Come on people thats sick don't you think? I mean, it could be a relationship, a job, a location, whatever and I never really realized how common this is until it happened to me on such an extreme level.  Why do we do this to ourselves? We have one life to live and we waste it being miserable. I know have for many years and I am giving this living to my full potential thing a shot.  Not sure what that is quite yet but I am going to follow my heart from now on, my instincts, and try my damn hardest to make decisions not based out of fear of being hard or difficult.  Let's see where this road takes me.  So in reality the end has really become a beginning.  Is your soul screaming inside your body? I know mine does...I am not living the life I am supposed to be living.  Imagine what the world would be if we all were living the lives we supposed to be living...